Robin LeBlanc: Jordan, have you been following the latest developments?

Jordan St.John: Naturally. It’s Toronto. Buildings are going up everywhere.

RL: No no, I mean the latest technological developments. This whole AI thing.

JSJ: Yeah, I’ve been meaning to ask about that. Who is Al, and why is he so famous?

RL: No, capital i. It’s an acronym for Artificial Intelligence. You can do all sorts of things with it now.

JSJ: Like automate a shopping list based on the contents of your fridge! Or end up getting punished in the future for not believing in it currently! I think that’s part of the TV I bought. It’s Roku’s Basilisk.

RL: Yeah, but right now the conversation seems to be centered on content creation. AI services like DALL-E or MidJourney, for instance, can create any kind of image you can think of, mimicking any artist to look like a work of art or being incredibly realistic. There’s also ChatGPT, which has created some alarmingly good written content. Honestly, the big concern right now is that they’ll replace writers entirely.

JSJ: Words? That’s where I live. When it was just pictures, it was fine, but words? I’ve been toiling in the word mines for generations, Robin. 

RL: Don’t I know it, but it really is very good. I’ve only had limited dealings with it, but I asked ChatGPT to make some Hey Arnold fanfic and it produced a really lovely story of Arnold and Helga in their thirties reminiscing about their past. Brought a tear to my eye, honestly.

JSJ: Well, I’m pretty sure we’re safe. AI doesn’t have a tongue, so our beer column is going to be just fine. We’re bulletproof, Robin! Bulletproof!

RL: Well tell you what, let’s give it a try. How about I ask ChatGPT to create…let’s say a conversation about Ontario craft beer between us? Just for a laugh to see how bad it is.

JSJ: Hey, I’m willing to take a look at how bad that thing is. Let’s do it.

RL: Okay…and entered. Here it comes.

 

 

JSJ: Well, that’s… I mean, it’s just reading our old columns and aping our style. Godspeed is onto Czech lagers now. And it seems to be referencing the 11.05 Collab between Sawdust and Nickel Brook. They haven’t even really done that since the pandemic.

RL: I don’t even think it’s aping our style and definitely reads like something written by an AI. I mean, kudos to being positive about the scene, but it’s a bit two dimensional. Where’s the heart?

JSJ: Yeah. That isn’t really biting my style. It’s not tonally accurate.

RL: Just out of curiosity, how about I try again and see if it can put a little humour into it?

JSJ: I don’t think it’s going to capture our wit and general bonhomie, but let’s spin the wheel and see what happens.

RL: Alright, here we go…

 

 

RL: I mean…a little bit too cynical.

JSJ: Yeah, we’re not quite that mean spirited, and I don’t think you’d put “Floral Saison” in quotes like that. 

RL: Yeah, that’s just a pile-on. And I mean, the jokes are good, but we usually have a wink to the audience. Usually because we’re referencing a show from the 1990s.

JSJ: Well, I’m pretty sure the AI has never seen Mr. Show or The State, so we’re probably alright on that front.

RL: Considering that I’m pretty confident that we’re safe, how about I tweak it to include some referential humour? I’m sure it’ll do something stupid like mix up the lines or something.

JSJ: Go for it. It’ll never capture the elegant throughline we weave through GEN X appropriate television.

RL: And…done.

 

 

JSJ: Robin, I’m scared.

RL: It absolutely 100% got our asses.

JSJ: What am I going to do with my life now? Go outside and actually meet people?

RL: I mean…look, yes, this is a bit scary, but AI still has a lot of hurdles to go before it reaches a mass market situation. There’s lots of ethical issues and accuracy concerns so it’ll be several years before we have to…uh oh.

JSJ: Uh oh? I don’t like the sound of uh oh.

RL: I just got an email from our editor and h

 

**EDITOR’S NOTE: ROBIN LEBLANC AND JORDAN ST. JOHN HAVE BEEN TERMINATED EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY AND THE REST OF THIS MONTH’S “IT’S YOUR ROUND” COLUMN WILL BE FINISHED BY CHATGPT. WE WANT TO TAKE THIS TIME TO THANK YOU FOR YOUR CONTINUED READERSHIP AND LOOK FORWARD TO PROVIDING YOU WITH MORE FUN INSIGHTS INTO THE ONTARIO CRAFT BEER SCENE. WE NOW RETURN TO THE REST OF THE COLUMN**